How Often Do Married Women Masturbate?

How often do married women masturbate? Probably more often than you think. It’s a question many people quietly wonder about and often surrounded by silence but quiet curiosity. But if you're hoping for a clear-cut answer on the numbers, here's the truth: there isn't one.

Masturbation among married women is more common and healthier than many realise. Whether it happens weekly, monthly, or not at all, it’s a deeply personal choice influenced by factors like stress, libido, life stage, and relationship dynamics.

In this article, we’ll take a closer look at what the research says, why and how often married women masturbate, plus the benefits it can bring to both individual well-being and partnered intimacy. We’ll also explore when masturbation might raise concerns in a marriage and why open, judgment-free communication is essential to understanding its role in a healthy sex life.

Female Masturbation: How Often Do Women Masturbate?

Female masturbation habit is often surrounded by a lot more shame and stigma than the male counterparts. But let’s be clear- there’s absolutely no shame in self sexual pleasure. A 2017 survey study[1] shows that 40% of women masturbated within a span of one month. Another informal yet large international survey study by a sex toy brand called "Womanizer" found that, on average, women masturbated approximately once a week or roughly 49 times per year.

Remember, self-pleasure isn't about the surveys or the statistics. Masturbation habits are personal. It’s not about how often others do it - it’s about what feels right for you. Masturbation frequency can vary based on many factors like age, sex drive, relationship status, culture, or personal comfort. If there’s one thing that doesn’t change, it’s this: whether you masturbate every day, rarely, or never - it’s your choice, and it’s okay.

There’s no ‘correct’ number of times someone should masturbate - married or not. What matters most is whether it feels right for you. And for many women, it’s a healthy, normal part of their sexual expression.

Why do Married Women Masturbate?

Masturbation is a natural expression of sexual desire, and for many married women, it remains an important part of their sexual well-being. Let's explore why married women choose to masturbate :

Exploring Personal Desires

Marriage doesn't mean the end of sexual curiosity or sexual desire. For many, it is a way to explore their bodies, discover what feels good, and better understand their sexual preferences. This sexual self-consciousness can even enhance sexual experiences with their partners[2], fostering a more fulfilling intimate relationship.

It is found that sexually satisfied women masturbate more when they are having sex. For many women, it goes hand-in-hand with sex, not against it. Sometimes it’s about finishing what didn’t happen during sex, as women tend to experience more orgasm gap[3], but more often, it’s simply about enjoying pleasure in their own way.

Stress Relief and Relaxation

Life can be overwhelming, with responsibilities related to work, relationships, parenting, or managing a household. Masturbation offers a moment of personal escape, releasing feel-good hormones, i.e, endorphins that help ease stress and promote relaxation[4]. For many married women, it's a simple but powerful form of self-care.

According to a study[5], for many married women, masturbation does not mean "a partner substitute" to seek sexual pleasure, but it is a stress-coping and relaxation strategy.

Supporting Sexual Satisfaction

Marriage is often associated with a consistent sex life, but the reality can be more complex. Partners may have mismatched libidos, differing schedules, or periods where intimacy takes a backseat.

Masturbation can also serve as a complementary activity that enhances sexual satisfaction within the marriage itself. By learning what they enjoy, they’re often better able to express their sexual desires, leading to a more satisfying sexual relationship.

A user on Reddit says, "I frequently masturbate after sex to the sex i just had__, either right away or within a day or two. Other than that, I maybe masturbate one to two times a month"__

Maintaining Libido Over Time

Over the years, factors like hormonal shifts, childbirth, or menopause can affect a woman’s sexual desire and sexual practices. Regular masturbation helps women stay connected to their sexual desires and helps maintain sexual self-esteem even during phases of less frequent partnered sex.

Health Benefits Of Masturbation in Women

Masturbation doesn’t just feel good - it can be good for you, too. While research on female masturbation is still limited, experts suggest it offers several benefits:

Physical Benefits

Mental & Emotional Benefits

Relationship Benefits

Better sleep

Less stress and anxiety

Improved sexual function and communication

Fewer cramps and PMS symptoms

Better mood

Less pressure on partners

Stronger pelvic floor

Greater body awareness

Maintained sexual interest

Stronger immunity

Higher sexual confidence

Complementarity of partnered sex

Pain relief

Clearer sexual preferences

increased sexual wellness and sexual development

Masturbation in Marriage: Is it Normal?

There is no shying away from the fact that most married men and women masturbate[6] and yes, it is normal. Even couples with a satisfying sex life masturbate. A 2017 study[7] found that partnered or mutual masturbation is the third most common sexual behavior a couple does together.

In marriages where sex isn’t possible due to untreatable medical conditions, sexual dysfunction, or sexual difficulties, but love and intimacy remain strong, sex therapists often recommend mutual masturbation as a meaningful and fulfilling alternative.

In any relationship, partners often have different levels of sexual desire. When one partner's sexual frequency is more than the other's, masturbation can be a healthy, respectful way to manage those needs without creating pressure or conflict.

It's essential to dismantle masturbation myths within marriage. Some say that masturbation is a sign of dissatisfaction with the sexual relationship. In reality, it can coexist with a healthy and satisfying marital sex life, serving as an additional sexual activity to maintain sexual health and sexual wellness.

A user on reddit wrote," Probably once every week or every other week. I don't have a high libido and sometimes it's just nice to relieve myself. Not that my partner doesn't do a fantastic job, he's very considerate".

When is Masturbation Harmful for Marriage?

While masturbation is generally healthy, in certain situations it can create relationship difficulties:

Communication Gaps and Misunderstandings

When masturbation isn't discussed openly, partners may develop misconceptions or feel insecure. One partner might wonder, "Am I not satisfying them?" while the other might feel guilty or secretive about a normal behaviour.

Avoidance Patterns

If masturbation consistently replaces rather than complements partnered intimacy, it may indicate underlying relationship issues that need addressing. This is different from temporary periods of solo preference, which are normal.

Compulsive Behaviour

Like any behaviour, masturbation can become problematic if it interferes with daily responsibilities, relationships, or well-being.

Shame and Guilt

Internal conflicts about masturbation, often stemming from cultural or religious backgrounds, can create emotional distress that affects both individual and relationship wellness.

Marriage & Masturbation: A Healthy Part of Intimacy

How often do married women masturbate? Well, there is no definitive answer, but what is clear is that it is normal and absolutely okay! How often you masturbate, whether single or married, is totally up to you.

For a married woman, masturbation isn’t a replacement for partnered sex - it’s an addition to their overall sexual well-being. It can boost satisfaction, support sexual health, and act as a form of personal self-care.

Sometimes, a little time with yourself is exactly what you need. There is no shame in little self-care care though, isn't it?